Various quotes of characters in conversation with Larry Laffer in Hoyle I.


  • Must you speak so of the ladies of your aquaintance, Sir Lawrence? 'Tis most unseemly!
  • I would never speak of my dearest Edgar the way you speak of your ladies, Lawrence.


  • These tales of yours, Lawrence, are somewhat unbelievable at best. Do you expect me to believe such foolishness?
  • Sir Lawrence, I am weary of your incessant ramblings. Couldn't thou kindly shut up?

Roger WilcoEdit

  • I've met a few interesting ladies myself. Like that green- haired Sarien commander, the one who tried to disintegrate me when we first met....
  • Did I tell you about that green-haired Sarien commander? What an amazing lady. I hope I'll meet her again someday....

The KidEdit

  • Most women seem to prefer a distinguished, debonair gentleman like myself to someone like you, Larry.
  • I've met some interesting women, travelling around the world. That lovely Russian Cribbage champion, for example....

Colonel Henri DijonEdit

  • Don't try to teach me about women, you young whippersnapper! Believe me, I know more about the subject than you can possibly imagine!
  • Ah, women!  One of my favorite topics.  I was quite a blade in my younger days, you know!

Sonny BondsEdit

  • Just shut up and play cards, Laffer.
  • I'd rather talk about playing cards than all the women you've known, Laffer. Of course, I've dated a lot more beautiful ladies than you ever will....


  • Put a muzzle on it, Larry! I'm tired of hearin' about all those women!
  • If you keep talkin' about women like this, Laffer, you're gonna see some fur fly!

Shelly LeBlancEdit

  • Whatsa matter with me? You think 'cause I have accent, I don't got no class? You all time talk like swamp gas. You best be quiet now, yes?
  • Pardon, Lemont Creante. If you want make scandal for me, you gonna have one mad redhead what knows where at the place to fix you good.

Warren SchwaderEdit

  • This is the first game where Larry Laffer has a chance to meet some women with real class. I still can't seem to make Larry act decent though.
  • Larry, you are just a figment of Al Lowe's warped imagination. Haven't you realized that you're not a real person?

Jerry MooreEdit

  • I'm really not crazy about this conversation, Larry. Why don't we just play the game?
  • I really wish he would talk about something else. I'm a married man, and if my wife ever heard that I was in a conversation like this....


  • I don't understand why Larry is here. He's not even in the set of serious players! And I definitely don't want to talk to him.
  • Listen, Larry, I have a Masters degree in Mathematics and I'm working on my doctorate thesis. I INSIST that you treat me with respect!


  • Hey, Larry, chill out! Enough about the babes already, okay? We're here to play cards!
  • Yo, Larry, is this the limit of your vocabulary or what?


  • Doesn't he ever stop talking? I wish he would.
  • I really wish you wouldn't talk so much, Mister Laffer.

Devin MooreEdit

  • I wish he didn't talk so much.
  • I wish Larry would shut up.

Christina SchwaderEdit

  • I don't understand that at all.
  • I don't like him, daddy. Can't you take that man out of the game program?

Sol SilvermanEdit

  • Larry, Larry, this really isn't the time or place. Let's talk about something else.
  • Do we really have to listen to this, Lawrence? You should learn to talk about something else.


  • Larry, honey, I think you're real cute...when you're at least ten feet away from me.
  • Larry, you know a lady likes to be chased. But you can't chase anyone if you're too busy admirin' yourself, sugar.
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